A Single Christian Girl's Survival Guide for the Holidays

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!”

1 John 3:1a-b

It’s November, so you know what that means: ’Tis the season for homemade pies, twinkling lights … and if you’re single like me, everyone in your family asking you, yet again, why there isn’t a ring on your left hand.

I don’t have enough money to pay my male co-worker to be my pretend boyfriend for the holidays like women do in those cheesy, made-for-television movies I can’t stop watching. Thankfully, God's Word offers a better way to thrive in — not just survive — the upcoming season. Maybe you or the single women you know are content with the gift of singleness, or maybe you’ve been asking for a refund for years. No matter where you are on the relationship spectrum, you can wear these biblical truths like an ugly Christmas sweater: with pride.

Survival Truth #1: You are more than your relationship status. (1 John 3:1)

Putting your identity in your relationship status is like anchoring a boat with a balloon: disappointing. Relationships, jobs and appearances fall short, change and can be lost … But who God says you are — His child who is loved and chosen, filled with purpose and worth — never changes.

Survival Truth #2: You are complete in Christ. (Colossians 2:10)

There is nothing wrong with you. You are not a puzzle with a missing piece, a hamburger looking for its cheese. You are whole in Christ, and in Christ alone. No earthly person can “complete” a heart God created.

Survival Truth #3: God doesn’t withhold any good thing from His children. (Psalm 84:11)

Romantic relationships and marriage are good things. But they may not be the best thing for all people at all times. Maybe God is protecting you in your singleness. Maybe He’s refining you. Maybe He has other things for you to be doing now that will glorify Him more than you being in a relationship.

Survival Truth #4: Your purpose remains the same. (2 Corinthians 5:20)

Married or single, our purpose remains the same: We are ambassadors of Jesus. Single women often have the blessing of more undivided, undistracted time. Are you using it to know God and make Him known? The end goal of your life is not to get married. The end goal of your life is to become more like Jesus in a world that needs Him.

Survival Truth #5: God always sees you and hears you. (Genesis 16:13)

Whether you cry tears of joy or heartache, God sees you, hears you and is there beside you. God doesn’t promise to give us a tall, dark and handsome husband … but He does promise to give us comfort, joy and peace. The best gift God will ever give us is the gift of His presence.

If you hear nothing else this holiday season, hear this: You are not less-than if you are single, just as married people are not more-than. Because of Jesus, we each have an identity, worth and purpose that never changes, no matter our relationship status. And here’s a bonus: Single ladies don't have to share our holiday leftovers.

Jesus, because of You, I am more than my relationship status. I am loved, chosen and worthy, and I have a purpose that will never change. Help me to remember these truths this holiday season. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.